Not Supermom

My blog has been up and running for about a month and half now.  For the last month and a half, I have had so many people approach me and say they enjoy reading it.

Thank you all for that. 

I appreciate the support from family, friends, and even strangers.  I am happy to know that you enjoy my writing, and I am even happier to know that my writing has made you think.

I have also heard, "You're awesome.  You're doing great. You handle this so well."

While I appreciate the sentiment, I have to tell you that you're wrong.

I am just a regular mom.  I am no stronger and no better than any other mom out there. I am not supermom.  Most days I don't feel like I am doing great, nor do I feel like I handle it well.

I say this because I want to encourage other special needs moms.  If you are just starting down this road, please don't think it takes a super hero with super powers to do this job.  Because here I am, living this autism life, and I am yet to find my super power!

You have a child with special needs.  Those special needs often require "extra."  Extra time.  Extra effort.  Extra help. Extra work.  Extra services.  Extra attention. Extra compassion.  Extra preparation.  Extra money.  Extra coffee.  (You knew I had to throw that in there.  Come on, Starbucks or Folgers, I'm waiting on my sponsorship, here!)

So you do it.  You do it all.  You do it because this is your baby.  You, as their mom, will do anything in your power to help them.  You do it, even when you don't feel like doing it.  You do it even though you are exhausted.  You do it, even if you aren't sure what you are doing!

In essence, you fake it 'til you make it.  You don't get a "special needs" handbook when your child is born.  No one is telling you exactly what to do or when to do it.  I think this life is always a work in progress. 

Some days you will feel defeated, lost, and alone.  Your thoughts will be wrought with worry.  There will be tears, heart ache, grief, and jealousy.   You are human and cannot help having these emotions.

It's what you do with these emotions that will matter.  If you get stuck in the sorrows, you will never experience the true joys.

Yes, this life is hard, I'm not going to lie to you.  But there is also nothing like it when your child reaches a new milestone.  The pride you feel in those moments is most certainly on par with the pride parents feel when their child wins an Olympic gold medal. 

No, you didn't know this would be your life.  You probably thought, "I could never do that."  You didn't feel prepared or ready.  You might have thought it would be impossible.  I read this Nelson Mandela quote today and loved it:

"It always seems impossible until it's done."

We can do this.  We didn't know that we had it in us, but it is there.  I promise.


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