Before I Knew
Before I knew that it was autism, I wondered what was wrong. Why didn't you look at me when I said your name? Could you hear? Did you understand what I was saying to you? Is this something you'll outgrow? As a speech language pathologist, did I just "know too much" and read into things more than I should have? Before I knew that it was autism, I worried about you. Why didn't you babble like babies are supposed to do? Why weren't you talking? Would things get better? Would you be okay? Before I knew that it was autism, I was scared. What is wrong with my baby? Why does everything seem to be so hard? Would things just "click" for you one day, or would everything always be a struggle? Would you ever learn new things? Could you learn? Before I knew that it was autism, I questioned myself. Did I do something wrong to cause your delays? Was this all my fault? What was I missing? Clearly, it was me a